The beginner’s guide to anal sex: 6 easy positions for comfort and pleasure
6 positions that make anal sex easier — even for beginners.
Even for people who are generally open-minded about sex, the idea of anal play can still feel intimidating, mysterious, or wrapped in taboo — especially if it’s something you’ve never tried before. Yet, once you move past the myths and focus on communication, consent, and preparation (plus a very generous amount of lube), anal sex can become an incredibly pleasurable and intimate experience.
Before diving in — quite literally — it’s important to remember that most fears around anal sex come from not knowing what to expect. Once you give it a chance, you might discover a whole new dimension of pleasure. Or, you might realize it’s simply not your thing — and that’s perfectly fine too. The point is: knowledge replaces fear, and exploration teaches you what truly feels good for your body. Many couples — and even an experienced escort model — agree that comfort and communication are the foundation of any satisfying encounter.
Interestingly, a study by the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior found that 100% of men and 94% of women reported reaching orgasm during encounters that included anal sex. This might be because anal play requires more patience, communication, and buildup — which naturally heightens arousal and emotional connection. Whether you’re curious, nervous, or ready to experiment, these six positions can make anal sex easier, more comfortable, and deeply satisfying, even for beginners.
1. The cowgirl (or cowboy)
This position is a great starting point because it gives the receiver — often called the “bottom” — complete control. The giving partner (the “top”) lies back while you straddle them, facing forward. From this position, you can control depth, rhythm, and pace, moving up and down at your own speed. The golden rule: don’t let your partner thrust until you’re fully ready.
The cowgirl position allows you to feel how your body reacts to penetration and to pause or adjust at any moment. Take it slow and focus on relaxing your muscles — being aroused beforehand helps tremendously. Just like an escort model who offers anal sex guiding an intimate session, confidence and pacing are everything.
If deep penetration isn’t your favorite sensation, you can use your hand to grip the base of your partner’s shaft or to stimulate their testicles and perineum, balancing intensity for both of you. It’s a position of empowerment, awareness, and connection — ideal for exploring anal pleasure in a safe and controlled way.
2. Doggy style
Let’s be honest — no list of anal sex positions would be complete without the classic doggy style. There’s a reason this one has stood the test of time. It’s versatile, comfortable, and provides a perfect angle for both pleasure and control.
For beginners, doggy style can help you focus on gradual insertion while maintaining a sense of freedom. You can adjust your posture — kneeling on all fours or keeping your knees wider apart, resting your chest on the bed for deeper relaxation. Always use plenty of lubricant and communicate constantly with your partner. A mature escort lady might tell you that this position is all about rhythm, patience, and breathing together.
If you have a vulva, stimulating your clitoris during anal penetration can amplify arousal and ease any tension. This position also opens the door (literally and figuratively) to double penetration — either with a toy or with a partner’s penis and a dildo.
3. Face to face
Who says anal sex can’t be romantic? The face-to-face position is perfect for couples who crave intimacy, eye contact, and closeness during penetration. The receiving partner sits on the lap of the active one, facing them, allowing for deep kisses, synchronized breathing, and an abundance of sensual touch.
Being on top once again gives you control over penetration depth and pace, while the closeness of your bodies allows extra stimulation of breasts, nipples, and clitoris (or chest and perineum, depending on anatomy). It’s also a position that a sensual escort model might favor for the emotional connection and sensitivity it fosters between partners.
This position can transform anal sex from something intense and primal into something slow, sensual, and emotionally connected. Try wearing a vibrating cock ring or holding a small bullet vibrator between your bodies — it adds stimulating pulses that enhance pleasure for both partners.
4. Missionary
It might sound surprising, but missionary can also be fantastic for anal play. This “vanilla” classic gets a bold twist when used for anal penetration. Lie on your back and lift your legs so they rest comfortably on your partner’s shoulders. This opens the angle and allows smoother entry.
For many beginners, missionary feels familiar and safe — there’s eye contact, gentle rhythm, and a sense of grounding. It’s also perfect for those who enjoy watching their partner’s reactions and maintaining closeness throughout. The top partner can control depth carefully, while the bottom focuses on relaxing and breathing. As a high-class escort might advise, small adjustments in angle can turn a simple move into a moment of pure pleasure.
Missionary makes it easier to kiss, talk, and connect — proof that anal sex doesn’t have to be wild or rough to be incredibly intimate.
5. Lying on your stomach
This position, sometimes called “flat doggy,” is one of the easiest and most relaxing options for beginners. Lying on your stomach naturally limits depth, making penetration slower and gentler. Place a soft pillow under your hips to slightly lift your pelvis — it helps the toy or penis find the right angle without strain.
If you have a vulva, this position also allows easy access for clitoral stimulation with your fingers or a vibrator (try a flat toy or a small bullet vibe). The dual stimulation — anal and clitoral — can lead to stronger arousal and deeper relaxation, which makes the experience even more pleasurable. Many sexy escort girl recommend this as a first exploration into anal play due to its comfort and control.
Because your body is fully supported by the bed, you can focus entirely on sensation rather than balance or movement. It’s perfect for those who want to ease into anal sex while still feeling cozy, grounded, and in control.
6. The spoon (side-by-side)
The spooning position isn’t new to most bedrooms, but few people think of it as an ideal setup for anal sex. Yet, it’s one of the best for comfort and relaxation. Both partners lie on their sides, with the receiver in front. The top partner enters slowly from behind, with both of you able to move gently in sync.
Being close and partially embraced helps the receiver stay relaxed, making insertion easier. To deepen the pleasure, bring your upper leg forward slightly toward your chest, which opens your hips and adjusts the entry angle. Holding a vibrator to your clitoris or perineum during penetration adds another layer of stimulation. Just as a VIP escort girl would emphasize, this position’s slow pace and emotional warmth make it perfect for beginners.
This position is soft, slow, and sensual — perfect for lazy mornings or late-night cuddles that evolve into something a little hotter. And because your bodies stay aligned, it’s easier to maintain rhythm and eye contact, even from behind.
Lube, patience, and pleasure — the three essentials
Regardless of position, lube is the ultimate key to anal pleasure. The anus doesn’t produce natural lubrication, so a generous amount is always necessary. Water-based lubes work best with condoms and silicone toys, while thicker anal formulas provide longer-lasting glide. Don’t rush the process: start with a clean environment, plenty of foreplay, and progressive stimulation — fingers, small plugs, or external touch — before penetration.
Breathing is another underestimated ally. When you feel tense or nervous, pause, exhale, and relax your pelvic muscles. Anal play is not a performance; it’s an exploration that unfolds best when both partners feel safe and connected. Even a transsexual escort model will tell you — patience and trust are what transform curiosity into pleasure.
Breaking the taboo
Anal sex often carries unnecessary stigma — myths about pain, hygiene, or “who should do it” have surrounded it for decades. But the truth is simple: when approached with preparation, trust, and respect, it can be as intimate, loving, and satisfying as any other kind of sex. It’s not about extremes or experimentation for its own sake; it’s about curiosity and communication.
Many people find that anal play enhances their understanding of pleasure, anatomy, and partnership. The act requires teamwork, honesty, and care — qualities that strengthen relationships far beyond the bedroom. It’s something a bisexual escort model knows well: real connection always begins with comfort and confidence.